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Aug 31

First 3 Days of School and Already I’m Tired

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First day of school, taken AFTER school

School started on Wednesday of this week, and I was doing the happy dance as my kids drifted out the front door. Granted, it was 6:00 a.m. at the time, as the older one has a zero hour class. Yes, you heard me right; ZERO HOUR, as in the class that happens prior to first period.

In order to cram as much learning as possible into one day, the first class at our high school starts at 6:30 a.m. The official start time for school is actually 7:25, which is when first period starts. (I think…I can’t actually tell you the exact time school starts). But there are some classes that our school district doesn’t know what to do with, so they hold them BEFORE school instead of after.

For example, at our high school AP Physics is offered only at 6:30 a.m. Can you believe that? I doubt Einstein even had his first brain synapsis of the day before eight. Yet we expect our kids to explain why when two trains leave a station in Chicago at the same time, one of them lands on the moon while Taylor Swift has Big Foot’s baby, relative to the speed of light in relationship to the gravitational pull of the planet Mars in the age of Aquarius. All before dawn.

For my son, his zero hour class is Varsity Jazz Band, so I guarantee he won’t be dropping that class any time soon. That means he has to get up at 5:00 a.m. to be able to leave the house by 6:00 a.m. to be in his seat and ready to blow his horn at 6:30 a.m. I’m surprised his eyes are open wide enough at that hour to even read music, let alone muster up the lung capacity to make a non-offensive sound come out of that horn.

Day One of School

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First day of school: How can this kid look so happy and awake at 5:30 a.m.?

Anyway, on the first day of school (Wednesday) I got up with my son at 5:00 a.m. I was going to make him breakfast, but he beat me to the punch. (Okay, I actually got up a little after five.) I took the obligatory first day of school picture, which has poor lighting because it was still as dark as midnight outside.

There’s only one kid in the picture (Derrick) because Kid #2 (Quinn) did not get into Varsity Jazz Band this year, and there’s no way he’ll sign up for anything else that commences at that ungodly hour. Being in 9th grade, he’s in JV Jazz Band, which is the LAST class of the day. (Woo-hoo for Quinn.)

Day Two of School

On the second day of school. I got up at about 5:45, which is right before my son leaves the house (thank God he drives himself). It was just enough time to say good-bye and pretend like I wanted to make sure he had everything. (He did. And would’ve even if I hadn’t asked.) He left, and I went back to bed until 6:35 a.m. when what’s-his-name, um…Kid #2 gets up.

Day Three…

Okay, today I didn’t bother to get up until almost 7:00. No sign of Derrick. I checked the garage and his car was gone. I’m going assume he went to school until I hear otherwise.

Quinn was up and had had his breakfast. To show solidarity I made him a lunch and drove him to school (even though he could walk). But I did so in my pajamas and slippers. As I dropped him off, I noticed another mom (also in a Subaru Outback) pop the trunk of her car so her son could get his trombone out. From her closed driver-side door I noticed a piece of her bathrobe poking out of the car. I thought about telling her, but then decided to check my own bathrobe to see if it was also waving to everyone in traffic.

It was.

Only 177 more days until school gets out. It’s going to be a long, exhausting year.

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Stacy Dymalski is a stand-up comic who gave up the glamorous life of coach travel, smokey comedy clubs, and heckling drunks for the glamourous life of raising kids (who happen to be bigger hecklers than the drunks). This blog is her new stage.

For more of Stacy’s comedy check out her hilarious book Confessions of a Band Geek Mom available in paperback and on Kindle on Amazon.com.

8 comments

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  1. Terri @ The Laughing Mom

    If that was me, I’d put wheels and a motor on my bed and drive them to class in between snores. Yikes! Your sons are very handsome!

    1. Stacy Dymalski

      Terri, you should see us in the dead of winter up here in the Wasatch Mountains. Around the winter solstice it doesn’t get light until around 8:30 a.m., so 5:00 a.m. feels literally like the middle of the night. Before Derrick could drive I use to have to take him to school at 6:00 a.m. (he’s actually been in this zero hour band class for a couple of years). I think your suggestion of a bed on wheels would’ve worked nicely for me.

      And thanks for the compliment about my boys being handsome. Of course, they absolutely get their good looks from me! ;-)

  2. Susan

    Classes at 6:30 in the morning? Yeesh. Our homeschooling set-up seems pretty sweet compared to that insanity (and I haven’t felt like that in a very long time). Very impressive that Derrick is moving and happy at that hour!

    1. Stacy Dymalski

      At least with homeschooling you can begin and end your school day whenever you want. As long as you the lessons in and they pass their tests at the end of the quarter/semester/year, the schedule is up to you. Honestly, that’s a checkmark in the “plus” column for homeschooling, if you ask me!

      And the only reason Derrick looks all happy and alert at that hour is because he loves his Varsity Jazz Band class and it’s a great start to his day. We should all be so lucky!

  3. Amy

    I’m tired just reading this. It’s just plain wrong getting up when it’s dark!

    1. Stacy Dymalski

      I know. I’m with you, Amy. I can only read this blog post so many times, and then I have to take a nap.

  4. Dee Macaluso

    ZZZZZZZZZ….

    1. Stacy Dymalski

      My sentiments exactly, Dee.

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